I am such a hypocrite. I both love and hate the phrase "just friends". I love being just friends with all the guys in my life. It gives me freedom to hang out with them and just chill without all the drama. Guys are kind of awesome like that. It's probably why I have a ton more guy friends than girl friends. Less drama, less stress, just hanging out and chilling.
The problem comes up when emotions get involved on either end. If a guy friend falls for me and i don't feel the same way, "hanging out" becomes stressful and tense. And if I fall for one of my guy friends... It makes me just a little miserable inside when we hang out because all that we will ever be is "just friends". So no matter which side it happens on, when emotions get involved, guy/girl friendships can kind of suck.
I don't know how to handle it when this happens. How can I still stay friends with a guy I know likes me in a different way than I like him? I become paranoid about the things I do or say, because I don't want to lead him on, but it hurts the friendship in the end... And how can I stay friends with a guy that i am falling for, especially when I know he doesn't feel the same way? It becomes a catch 22. I want to talk to him all the time because I like him and want to know him better, but then when I do it becomes painful knowing that nothing will ever happen, so it makes me want to avoid him altogether. Again, in the end it damages the friendship.
So guy/girl friendships are either incredibly amazing and awesome, or they make you feel like crap. The only question is, when is it worth it? When is even the pain or awkwardness worth keeping the relationship? And if it is, how do you handle it?
I just don't know. In the end all I can do is pray and ask God's wisdom and guidance. Only He knows the plan He has for my life, after all is said and done... But in the meantime... It can still kind of suck.
The problem comes up when emotions get involved on either end. If a guy friend falls for me and i don't feel the same way, "hanging out" becomes stressful and tense. And if I fall for one of my guy friends... It makes me just a little miserable inside when we hang out because all that we will ever be is "just friends". So no matter which side it happens on, when emotions get involved, guy/girl friendships can kind of suck.
So guy/girl friendships are either incredibly amazing and awesome, or they make you feel like crap. The only question is, when is it worth it? When is even the pain or awkwardness worth keeping the relationship? And if it is, how do you handle it?
I just don't know. In the end all I can do is pray and ask God's wisdom and guidance. Only He knows the plan He has for my life, after all is said and done... But in the meantime... It can still kind of suck.
Aggh, I am sorry, I have been there and there are fewer things more painful and frustrating. It ended, I was crushed awfully, and a respectful distance was the only way forward from that point on. I think that it's so tricky, and I pray God gives you lots of wisdom to know the best way cause there are no textbook answers to this one!
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